Lot of customs followed by our ancestors are often misinterpreted, misunderstood or termed superstitious. One such interesting custom which is still being followed in some parts of Tamilnadu is the subject of this post.
It’s a custom amongst the ancient Tamils that married women have their food only after their husband finishes his meals. Interestingly they will take food in the same Plantain leaf/Plate which he had used. Once the husband finishes his food he leaves something for his wife and she eats the remnants and maybe she might take extra food after that.
Though the Reason being something that touchy, people have interpreted it otherwise. Some say, this custom came into existence because some wives poisoned the food kept for their husband, thereby killing him (Reasons told vary from person to person). So the husbands made their wives to eat the same food kept for him so that their wives don’t indulge in such crooked things fearing that their own life would also be at stake.
The real reason behind this is the care the husband’s have towards their beloved wives. Ancient family system amidst Tamils was predominantly the joint family system. Even in joint families women have food only after the men in the family finish their course. When men finish the meals the women have to divide among what is left. If only little is left then the individual share too diminish. So, Husbands were always worried about the availability of the food for their wives, so they leave good amount of food in the plate itself when they leave the table. Since the food cannot be wasted, with no option left the wives finish what is left by their respective husbands. This is how men indirectly fed their wives and also this shows how much men cared for their women in those days.
Posted by Madan on February 26, 2011 at 6:55 pm
and another notable meaning is also there behind the custom. Imagine a boy is so child like character, may be madan. He does not even know the real meaning of marriage, thaali etc and he ties thaali just like that to a young beautiful girl, may be katrina who has three big brothers, may be hari, joel, nirmal. So there should be some point where this unknown marriage comes into light. So the girl after knowing the real meaning of the custom, goes to dust bin, picks up the plantain which i threw after eating and eats the food without showing to others. So if some one notices it, may be wife of hari, then this marriage will be known to them also and there will be a twist.
Posted by joelred on March 2, 2011 at 11:52 am
Hereafter don’t use the word ‘Child-like’. This is a warning
And also stop copying cinemas, Cinema can nowhere come near real life customs.
Posted by Madan on March 7, 2011 at 3:29 pm
cinema is a replica of real life